Frills and Thrills
by QueenCelestiaxyv
Summary: Roderich has an embarrassing secret, and Vash is convinced that his lover is having an affair. Lime. VashxRoderich


**Title:** Frills and Thrills

**AN:** I am de-anoning this. This was written for a Secret Santa thing.

PAIRING CHOSEN: SWITZERLAND X AUSTRIA

**Part One: Vash**

It was always hard to trust someone you had lost trust in.

Which pretty much summed up their relationship.

He wasn't sure what had reunited them, although he half suspected his sister was to blame.

Everything had been sort of rocky, but a mutual understanding had happened, and after a few hot kisses, and the joining of their bodies, he had assumed things would be good.

Apparently not when it came be being in love with a serial marrier.

The problem was that he believed Roderich was cheating on him.

He could tell by the soft looks, the sighs, the wanting to be away from him, the soft dark moments when Roderich thought Vash wasn't looking – all the signs of cheating.

Roderich, of course, absolutely denied any such thing, laughing it off as Vash being paranoid.

Of course he would be paranoid! Roderich had broken his heart ages ago, and ended up married to that...THAT woman! Not that he personally held anything against her [but seriously? Married to a woman who spent the first part of her life convinced that she was a man? And then to cheat on her with some idiot who thought he ruled the world and whose best friend was a tiny yellow bird? Really?] but Roderich had proved to be shady in the past.

He kept trying to convince himself that the best move would be to break up and never deal with the man again. But his sister would look at him knowingly whenever he muttered these empty threats, and he would resign himself to putting up with the other man's eccentricities.

If he were to be completely honest with himself, he would admit that he had pined for the man for years. Wanted to touch him, talk to him, share ways to be frugal – something others apparently didn't understand. Hell, others usually teased him about it, but Roderich understood that money was important and that to preserve it was the best way.

Roderich had even complimented his rather worn out shirt the other day, probably knowing that Vash had owned it for a good few years.

Steps light, Vash knew he was going to catch Roderich cheating on him today.

He even had a camera ready, so he could replay it for his own heart breaking satisfaction.

It was easy to figure out where Roderich was, from the choppy clunks of the piano ringing throughout the house.

No one else would be in, Vash knew, in fact, he wasn't even supposed to be in.

Hence his 'catching' the other.

The servants had been dismissed for their day off, and Roderich was theoretically all alone in his house.

Theoretically.

He pushed the button, hoping that the 'ding!' sound of the camera turning on wouldn't be picked up by the other man, whose piano playing had become more erratic.

Soft panting could be heard now, as Vash made sure his camera was recording. Shaky hallway could be seen with each step as he drew nearer to the sounds.

"Please," came the broken whisper, a whisper that tugged Vash's heart into a million pieces. Roderich never used that tone with him, who could Roderich be with? Who would he dare open himself to in such an intimate manner, when he Vash hadn't been able to do that at all?

Hand upon the doorknob, Vash took a deep breath, stealing himself for what he would see, hating the fact that his crazy assumptions were actually going to be proven true.

The door clicked open, and Vash aimed the camera, ready to see the bastard that Roderich would be with... except...

He wasn't sure what he was seeing.

Certainly there was Roderich, but …

Roderich was splayed out atop of his black Bösendorfer, his arm arched out and touching the keys, hence the erratic playing.

If that wasn't enough of a shocker, it was what Roderich was wearing that stunned Vash.

A frilly purple maid outfit with white lace, the skirt hiked up, revealing lacy pantaloons around ankles in well defined lacy socks…. A hand wrapped around a very erect cock, purple and …. Tied at the base by a scrap of yellow frilly lace that served as a startling contrast and made the entire situation seem like a present.

Needless to say, Vash was rock hard at the sight.

The camera shook in his hands, as he simply watched his erstwhile lover touch himself, elegant fingers tracing along the swollen cock in a mock rhythm as if he were still playing the piano with that hand.

Mesmerized, Vash watched, not even caring if the camera was catching it all or not, the erotic sounds his lover was making seemed to increase as he watched with pounding heart, as Roderich removed the lace tie, his ejaculation spurting out, splattering up against the soft material of the skirt.

A shaft of sunlight seemed to illuminate the soft curve of Roderichs neck, his face entirely peaceful in the afterglow, his fingers pushing against the keys lazily, until, with a resounding crash, Vash dropped the camera.

With speed Roderich sat up, his purple eyes wide with shock and embarrassment.

Tension frizzled between them, Awkward with a capital A hanging there between them like a thick bungee cord ready at any time to snap and break.

The snap came when Roderich attempted to shift, his face bright red, and ended up falling off his piano, a resounding crash of frills, flesh and embarrassed Austrian which seemed to snap the Swiss man out of his shocked stupor.

Years of training came in handy as he rushed to his lovers aid, as he made sure that Roderich wasn't concussed and ascertained that he had only achieved a few bruises.

"Roderich," Vash murmured, as he held the highly embarrassed Austrian in his arms, smoothing away the errant curl that always seemed intent on getting in the way, "What the hell?"

Purple eyes couldn't meet his green, focused on the intricate lace floral on the cuff of his dress. Bright red tinged the Austrian's cheeks, and he struggled to get out of the Swiss man's firm hold.

"It's – it's nothing." Came the murmur, but Roderich stopped struggling when he realized that Vash was not going to let up his hold any time soon.

"Nothing? Masturbating atop your piano in a purple frilly dress is nothing?" Vash's feelings were complex, he was relieved that Roderich was not having an affair on him, but he was sort of…. Mind fucked over the fact that his eminent competition was in fact an inanimate object. How the hell was one supposed to compete against a piano anyhow? Another part of his mind had exploded into red hot thoughts of 'oh my fucking god that was the hottest thing ever how can I get him to do that again but include me?'

The Austrian bit his lip, a habit he denied having.

"Don't bullshit me," Vash added in warning, as he shifted, so that Roderich was more easily placed between his splayed legs.

"I… I .. it's embarrassing." Came the tiny plea.

Vash stoically waited for more.

"I uhm… " Roderich trailed off. "Could we perhaps move? I don't want to tell you with you holding me like this; it's making the situation more difficult…."

"As long as you don't run away – I have it on video tape ya know." Vash added with a growl, opting out mentioning that he wasn't sure if the camcorder survived the epic crash to the floor.

Roderich's eyes widened in horror and he gave a nod.

Letting go, Vash watched as Roderich scooched away from him before turning around and facing him, eyes sober.

"Vash, ,butIcan''sfinewithme."

Vash stared.

"Say it again, but slower."

Roderich's entire face seemed to darken in red embarrassment, as he mumbled, "I get turned on wearing frilly dresses and jacking off on my piano, since the piano is my safe zone." Worried purple eyes looked up to him, "And I know its weird and disgusting, but after so many years denying this, it… I … well I won't choose. You can either accept it or ignore it, but I'm not stopping."

"… is this why you've been so distant?" Vash asked, his feelings still running on confusion.

Roderich gave a brief nod, "No one is supposed to know about this, not even you…"

"Is there anything else you've been keeping from me?"

The Austrian paused, before cautiously replying with, "You're not disgusted by this?"

"Well, if you haven't been fucking around behind my back, I have no issue with you wearing frilly dresses." The other roughly admitted.

The Austrian processed that before adding, "And I have vivid fantasies of leaving the house dressed as a woman… and… being treated like a dirty slut… as if I were your property."

Roderich was so embarrassed admitting this that he could only stare intently down at his skirt, fingers bunching up in the purple material.

"Ah? Is that all?"

Roderich gave a shamed nod.

Thinking on the admission, Vash found himself easily accepting it – it explained why the marriage and subsequent relationship with that idiot had failed, if Roderich hadn't been able to fulfill his wildest dirtiest fantasies. Actually, it made Vash feel special that he had gotten this confession out of his lover, it made him realize that perhaps things really could work out.

"And you want to be _my_ property?" Vash asked, his voice tinged with a sick longing of possessiveness.

Roderich nodded.

"How long have you felt like this Roderich?"

He was met by silence.

"Look at me Roderich; how long have you wanted to be possessed by _me_?"

Vash could tell by his tone of voice that he was causing Roderich some discomfort, as unfocused violet eyes flitted up and met his, as if the answer was more like pulling teeth than any proper confession.

"Tell me Roderich."

The abused lip jutted out a moment, before Roderich whispered, "Years."

"Years?"

The other man nodded, a look of complete embarrassed misery on his face, "I ... really wanted you for a while. I tried to ignore it, ignore my fantasies, but... well... did you know they were the ones to break up with me?"

Vash only stared, wanting the other man to continue, he wasn't too sure what to say at this point, except that his possessive happiness seemed to be soaring around like some fucking eagle that had just killed a fucking antelope.

Elation would be too small a word as his worries were being crushed one by one by this uncharacteristically shy and ashamed Roderich sitting before him.

"They said I was too cold... distant." Roderichs hands continued to fiddle with his dress, "But, well... I .. uhm.. ah. Couldn't tell them my fantasy, I mean... well, I found they couldn't replace _you_. I mean I'm sure you noticed how... commanding they both were but... I realized that replacing someone isn't so easy."

Before Vash could know what he was doing, he had reached out, and pulled Roderich close to him, kissing the other man with all the passion he felt, not caring at all that he had taken the other completely by surprise. All his worries seemed silly now, he was glad he had listened to Liechtenstein, listened to her soft prods, to give Roderich another try. She had been right the entire time, that Roderich had been missing him despite being married. He was going to buy her a pony the next time he saw her, one with a big pink bow.

Roderichs lips seemed to merge into his as the other man began to kiss in, fully surrendering, the hands that had been fiddling with the dress, reaching up and clinging tightly to Vash's shoulders.

When their lips finally saw fit to part, Vash nuzzled Roderichs cheek, "Don't be an idiot ok? I... love you. Frilly dress and all. I seriously thought you were cheating on me, didn't want me anymore..."

To admit this much was highly embarrassing, something Vash didn't like to do so much, but as long as he got it into Roderich's brain that no matter how weird the quirk, he was fine with it.

**Part Two: Roderich**

"Are you sure you want to do this?" came the nervous question. He still couldn't quite believe that Vash had so easily accepted his strange desires. He had lived for years in fear of being found out, and had expected Vash to look at him in absolute disgust and turn away, make fun of him, reject him so absolutely and then spread it around. Except, now that he thought about it, he knew that even if Vash was disgusted by his strange desires, that he wouldn't go spreading it around. Vash was very good when it came to secrets that required the utmost confidentiality.

Still, he hadn't expected Vash to be so _devoted_ to making him happy – well, so willing.

"Of course I do, that's why I'm here isn't it?" came the gruff response.

"But you haven't seen me yet."

Roderich leaned against his bedroom door, feeling excited and scared.

When he had fantasized about this moment, he had never imagined how excited he would feel, to know that Vash would so willingly help him fulfil his fantasy.

"So? I've already figured out you're going to be wearing some sort of frilly dress. Get out here Roderich, and let me look at you."

The absolute command in Vash's tone made Roderich's knees a little weak, and taking a deep breath he placed his hand on the door handle.

With a brave twist of the handle, he opened the door, revealing himself fully made up to his lover.

Was his fantasy really going to be fulfilled? Would Vash change his mind?

Roderich felt self conscious in the dress he had chosen, one that really suited him. One that he had to secretly order online, and then angst over someone finding out what it was – he had nearly had a heart attack as it passed through Customs, but then had his backup story that he was especially ordering the dress for Elizabeta.

When it had finally arrived he had nearly wilted in relief.

The squirming in his stomach had nothing at all to do with remembering the initial angst in getting this dress, instead it had all to do with the green eyes critically drinking him in.

"Well?" Roderich managed to ask, hating how his cheeks were most likely flushed from embarrassment and fear.

"Blue really suits you, although I'm not too sure about the wig."

Nervous hands flew up to his hair, "Is it on wrong? Should I take it off?"

"No. I'm just not used to you with long hair that's all. Here."

Vash crooked his elbow towards Roderich, waiting for the other man to take the offer. With a slight tremor, Roderich did so.

"So what do you have planned?" asked Roderich.

Vash smiled, "It's a surprise. Trust me."

Roderich did not like surprises, Vash should know that. Roderich preferred carefully controlled environments, where an instrument was close at hand, in case he had to express his emotions violently.

However, Roderich followed Vash's lead as they walked out of the house, his eyes widening comically as he saw their mode of transportation.

"What is _that_?" Roderich couldn't believe or fully comprehend what lay before him. He had been expecting them to take public transportation, or at least have Vashs small reliable manually repaired vehicle take them to town.

Not this… sleek beast of a machine.

Smirking slightly, Vash replied, "Can't tell a Jaguar when you see one?"

"B-b-but what's it doing _here_? Did you steal it from Gilbert?" Roderich replied attempting to regain his composure.

Opening the side door for Roderich, Vash shook his head, "Sometimes it's good to splurge."

Walking towards the open door, Roderich reverentially touched the vehicle, his mind attempting to calculate the cost of the vehicle, just boggling at the fact that Vash would 'splurge' out in such a way.

Usually if he splurged it was for military equipment or a new gun, not a sleek and shiny car that would whimper like a kicked puppy if caught in the middle of a border battle.

No, Roderich amended; it would be _me _whimpering like a kicked puppy if even a tiny scratch was shown on this black beast.

The black jaguar convertible was like heaven, as Roderich slid into his seat, watching as Vash, ever the perfect gentlemen closed the door for him, as if these actions were the usual, as if it was the usual thing for him to go out in a dress and ride in a sleek and elegantly designed car.

The soft leather seat seemed to encompass him, and the smell of 'new car' filled his nostrils. He had been half hoping Vash had got this as a hand me down – a very expensive one – and got a pleasurable thrill as he realized that this car had all the signs of being brand spanking new. It almost felt like a naughty sin to be so luxurious.

Roderich couldn't help but reproach him, "You really shouldn't have spent your money in such a way." His tone was belied by how his hands kept running over the mahogany, fiddling with the knobs, and constant shifting around in his seat to fully look at the vehicle.

As Vash sat down beside him, he slipped on a pair of aviator glasses, before handing a pair to Roderich. Tentatively, Roderich took them, before slipping them on as well, a small thrill going through him at the thought at... well for lack of a better word 'awesome'. Inwardly he cringed from borrowing a word from Gilbert's limited lexicon, however there wasn't another one that he could think of that would be appropriate. 

"Well, you see, I noticed my savings were getting sort of big..." Vash trailed off, shooting Roderich a rather wry look, as if waiting for the other man to pick up on the joke.

"But still! What if there was an emergency!" Roderich naively replied, before looking at Vash as a silence descended between them. Seeing the look the other was giving him, Roderich flushed as he realized the joke had flown over his head. Stubbornly, however, he didn't take back his words.

After another moment, Vash turned the vehicle on, the soft purr sensuous and quiet, bringing the Jaguar to life.

With skill that belied years of training, Vash drove the car away from the house, before pushing a button and causing the top of the car to creep down, watching from his peripheral vision how fascinated his lover was at this ridiculous expense.

Cool air hit them, Roderich gasping, as his hands protectively clamped onto his wig, before realizing that Vash's speed wasn't too fast, and that it would be safe enough to sit like a normal person.

They drove in some silence, the wind winnowing around them, until Vash broke the silence.

"If this was Gilbert's car, it would be dented, or broken in some way. I wouldn't trust anyone I love in a vehicle owned by Gilbert, unless I had gone over it myself and made sure it was safe."

"Don't be so hard on Gilbert," Roderich replied softly, feeling warm however at the openly expressed implication that Vash loved him, and deeply valued his life, "He's an idiot, but he means well."

Vash snorted. "I pity the fool he eventually ends up with."

Roderich smiled, "They'd be far more understanding than me at least."

An awkward tension seemed to build between them, as Roderich seemed to reflect on his past relationship with Gilbert, before adding, as if in an afterthought, "I think he's with Canada now..."

"Who?"

"I can't quite remember his personal name, but, the quiet one with the bear, you know... Rockies?"

Vash took a moment, before he replied, "Oh right, the ignored one. What would he see in Gilbert?"

Roderich couldn't help the soft smile as he replied, "What do you see in me?"

"I love you," Vash replied, his eyes firmly focused on the road.

"I expect it would be much the same thing." Came the murmur.

The conversation ended, the silence coming back between them, until Vash entered the town, and parked the vehicle outside a small restaurant, one that didn't look too busy, and family run.

He made sure the top of the convertible was properly on before opening the door for Roderich, who was attempting to figure out why Vash would want to take him to this place.

There was nothing particularly special about it, and as he stepped out of the vehicle, his eyes assessing, it was actually sort of dingy, well the outside at least. The stone exterior seemed worn, as if many generations had passed down the restaurant.

Pushing open the thick wooden door, Roderich changed his mind at the comfortable homey atmosphere, as they were led to private table near the back.

The atmosphere was lowly lit to be more intimate but not so dark that you could barely see the fork in front of you. The chairs were accommodating, and the oaken table dark and polished.

Picking up the heavy menu, Roderich assessed the food pleasantly surprised by how reasonable the prices were.

"This place has good food," Vash replied, "I also knew you wouldn't be able to fully enjoy yourself if the prices were something that made you uncomfortable."

"Yes, well," Roderich mumbled, pleased that Vash had put so much forethought into this. It was true; he would feel awkward eating something that he knew was only worth one percent of the stated price.

It helped comfort him, that fancy car, or no fancy car, Vash was still Vash.

The food was excellent, the service without pretention, and the conversation flowed naturally as they caught up on the small details that usually would get lost in the cracks of a busy day.

Roderich seemed to be most interested in the story of how Vash bought his adoptive sister a pony, and how delighted she was. When he asked to see the pictures, Vash looked surprised and a little guilty at being caught out.

Producing his wallet, Roderich was amused at how many pictures Vash did have of his sister, but also touched that there were also pictures of himself.

"Why does the pony have a pink bow on it?" asked Roderich, as he returned the wallet.

Vash shrugged, his cheeks slightly pink, "I don't know, she's a girl and likes things frilly I guess."

Roderich smiled, and took a sip of his wine.

It was only when Roderich got up to use the washroom did he remember how he was dressed, small panic setting in as he headed towards the facilities, his heart settling as he realized due to the smallness of the restaurant, that the bathroom was unisex. Vash really did put much forethought into this location, he found himself thinking with gratitude.

After dinner, Vash did not head back straight to the vehicle, instead, he suggested that they go for a walk, since the evening was pleasant, and the food was really, rather filling.

Relaxed, Roderich agreed, any feelings of nervousness completely banished.

The town was pleasant, and the folk friendly, not seeming to notice that there was anything amiss with the couple, or the fact that Roderich was, in fact, a man.

Actually, if Roderich were to allow himself the admittance, quite a few other men were leering at him, but he couldn't be too sure, because whenever he curiously focused on them, their faces seemed to blanch, and their attention turned elsewhere.

"Stop looking at them so frankly," Vash hissed, after another such occurrence, "You're encouraging those perverts."

"What do you mean?" Roderich replied, sounding rather naive.

"You look nice, ok? They want a piece of you," Vash frankly replied, his cheeks tinged pink at the admission.

Roderich smiled, "Vash, I think you're being a little silly."

The other just stubbornly set his jaw as they continued their walk, entering a small pleasant park. An ice cream booth was nestled in, as if it had always been part of the scenery.

"Do you want some ice cream?" The question seemed random, and broke the silence that had cropped up between them.

"Sure." Roderich replied. They had been walking for a while, and the weather was warm enough to make the idea of an ice cream pleasant.

"Wait here…" Vash said, as he walked towards the ice cream booth in the park.

Watching his lover walk off to order some ice cream, Roderich did not do as told, in fact, he had a habit of notoriously not doing as told, usually he had a sound reason (at least to him they were sound reasons; such as the sun was too bright, the ground too muddy, or he wanted to complete playing a certain symphony), however to others, his reasons always seemed unsatisfactory.

His reason for wandering, was because he noticed a rather beautiful garden, it wasn't too far from where Vash had left him, and he knew that he would be easy to find, or he assumed he would be.

In fact, he became so engrossed with looking at the garden, Roderich hadn't noticed how far off he had wandered, until a rude voice abruptly pulled him from his poetic musings.

"Excuse me?" he politely inquired.

The man smirked at him, and leered at him in a way that definitely made Roderich uncomfortable.

He had never had the experience to have so unpleasant a man hit on him before, and he suddenly had much sympathy for Elizaveta.

Automatically he tuned out the man's words, and politely replied, "Not interested."

However much to Roderich's horror, the message didn't seem to get through! In fact, the man seemed to lumber closer, a distinct whiff of some sort of revolting cologne mixed with garlic filling the air like a toxic bouquet.

"Good day sir," Roderich replied more firmly, freezing as a thick dirty hand grabbed onto his wrist.

Now Roderich liked to keep the peace, live a life filled with symphonies and good food. Roderich however, also liked to keep clean.

"If you could please unhand me, sir," he attempted.

The man instead grabbed his other wrist and leered at him.

Affronted by the man's obvious intentions, Roderich sighed and did the only thing he could think of at the time – head butt the man.

A series of events occurred that Roderich was not too sure about, except his forehead hurt massively, and the man had suddenly let go, followed by an ominous clicking.

Rubbing his wrists where the man had grabbed, it took a moment for Roderich to register the small handgun pressed to the man's head and the eerie silence that seemed to fill the air around them.

The man seemed confused before the cold metal against his head seemed to clue him in that he was in deep shit.

"Leave him alone," came the dark hiss by Vash, followed by a couple more phrases that it would be unseemly to write down.

The man seemed to gulp at the adjective 'him' his fear laden eyes widening even more as he stared at what he thought was a woman, who was primly straightening himself out, and smoothing the skirts, apparently not caring at all that his psycho boyfriend was holding a gun to his head.

"I think you should kick him," the man in the dress said, addressing the psycho boyfriend as if he wasn't there.

"Really?" the word seemed drenched in disappointment, "With scum like him it would make the world a better place if I just shot the bastard." To emphasize the point, the gun pressed harder against the man's cranium.

Rubbing his forehead, where he had hit the man, Roderich replied, "Just because we are above the law doesn't mean we need to make petty killings whenever possible."

Who were these people? Thought the man fearfully, as words to spare him tumbled out of his mouth as if of their own volition. Above the law? Talking as if death was nothing of consequence.

His words were cut short however, as a swift hard steel toed kick to his family jewels caused him to collapse to the ground, wheezing in pain.

Tear filled eyes looking up and thinking how odd the scene was, as the blond haired man tucked the gun away, and then handed one of the ice creams he had been holding in his one hand to the man in the dress, he knew it would be one of those memories that would last in his mind like a snapshot for the rest of his life.

Roderich knew that Vash was angry at him, the way he licked his ice cream and how tense he was were the obvious signs.

"I didn't mean to wander so far," he said, it was more of a statement and not really an apology. Roderich never apologized if he could help it. "Anyway, how was I to know someone of the less savoury sort would pop up?"

"You still shouldn't have wandered – if I hadn't of showed up, you could have been in some serious trouble." Vash replied.

Roderich snorted, "I think not, just because I prefer not to fight doesn't mean I _won't_. Didn't you see me head butt the guy?"

The other man was silent for a moment, and stealing a glance out of the corner of his eye, Roderich noticed that Vash was attempting not to smile.

"Are you laughing at me?" came the haughty demand.

Immediately Vashs' face straightened up, "No."

"You were." Came the accusation, "If you don't answer honestly I'm going to dump the rest of this ice cream on your head."

Green eyes locked with violet, before the green relented.

"Actually I was damn proud, I was thinking of letting you finish." Vash admitted, a grin breaking out, "But then I thought you might not like that, so I intervened."

"Idiot." Roderich replied, his anger abating into fondness.

They ate the rest of their ice cream in silence, the only action acknowledging that there was peace between them was the tentative brushing of hands, before with a small smile, Roderich took charge and grabbed the other man's, shameless in their showing of affection.


End file.
